Artemis Meets the Suite Life

~ Chapter One ~

“Florida is a vacation. Hawaii is a vacation. New York is a vacation. Boston is not a vacation!” “Arty, dear, do not be such a grouch. This is a time to relax.” “Yes mother.” “Arty, would you go find something to do while we get our rooms?” Artemis was about to go sit down and read when two twins came bursting in.

“Hey, Zack! Give it to me!” “Heads up!” Then they noticed Artemis staring at them. “Hey. I am Cody Martin. This is my brother, Zack. We live at the Tipton. If you want a tour, we can give you one.” Artemis just gave them his best vampire glare. Zack and Cody jumped back. “Artemis! Artemis! We want some candy!” That was his two pesky little brothers. “Fine.” He went up to get some candy. “What is with that dude?” “I have no idea.”

“Artemis, dear. We need to get to our suite now. “Yes mother.” They went to their suite. Myles and Beckett ran to look around. “Arty, would you go with your brothers and explore around a bit? Your father and I have work to do.” Yes mother.” Artemis left the suite. He went with his brothers and they crashed into Maddie. “Sorry. I am in a rush. I am going to be late! Bye!” Then Maddie hurried down the stairs. Artemis started walking when he crashed into London. “AHHHHHHHHHH! A VAMPIRE!” Then she ran down the stairs. Artemis sighed. This was not his day.

“Hey, Arwin, there is a kid at the hotel that looks like a vampire.” “AHHHHHHHHHH! A vampire! I want my mommy.” “Chill Arwin.” “Let’s go see him!” Arwin, Zack, and Cody went to go find Artemis. “Look! There he is!” When they went toward Artemis, a very large man stepped in front of them. They looked up and stepped back. They heard Artemis say to the large man,”Butler, I am very much fed up with this place! There are those two boys that always cause trouble. My parents forbade me to bring my laptop! I have nothing to do.” “Sir, I suggest you go to the pool or the library. Maybe even to the park.” Artemis turned to Butler. “I have no interest in any of those ideas.” Then Artemis walked away.

Now there is going to be a new character added. Her name Artemis too. Whatever the girl Artemis says will be in bold italic.

Once Artemis walked away, another family came in. There was a girl, a boy, a mother, and a father. The girl was about seventeen or eighteen. The boy(or man) was about twenty or twenty-one. The girl separated herself from the family and sat down. She opened her laptop and began doing something. At that time, Artemis decided to come back in.

“Artemis! Would you please come here for a moment?” That was the girl’s mother. She sighed and closed her laptop. She walked up to her mother to see what was the problem. Artemis Fowl stood there watching. “Honey, I do not understand this one.” “It means what is your first, middle, and last name mother.” “Honey, why don’t you want to go to that school for geniuses? It is such a nice place.” “The plural form of genius is genii! I just do not want to.” “It is much better than the other genius school you go to.” “No.” Then she sat down and opened her laptop again.

Okay. If any of you got confused on which Artemis is which, I fixed that.

“Artemis dear! It is time to go unpack!” “Yes mother.” When they went upstairs, they unpacked. Then Artemis’s mom came in and asked her,”Artemis dear, would you go down and explore a little bit? Your father and I must get work done. “Yes mother.” Artemis took her laptop with her and went downstairs. At that time, Artemis Fowl decided to go back down. When he did, he saw the other Artemis on her laptop. He went closer to her. “When he got behind her, he asked her,”May I borrow that?” The other Artemis turned around. “Are you not Artemis Fowl? Never mind. I know who you are. Here. I just finished with it.” Then Artemis Fowl took the laptop and sat down.

“Are you sure?” “Yes, I am sure.” Artemis watched her as she left the room. All of a sudden, she came running back in. “”Cody! Give that to me! No! Don’t throw it to Arwin! He is a very bad catcher!” “OWWWWWWWWW!” “Sorry Arwin!” Mr. Moseby comes in. “What are you hooligans doing! We have two very special guest here that are from Ireland!” He looks behind him. “Ahhhh. Here is one of them. The other is over there! Come here!” Artemis Fowl closed the laptop and slowly made his way to Mr.Moseby.

“Don’t be shy! Come on!” Artemis Fowl was thinking,”Will he ever be quiet?” He went towards Mr. Moseby. Then, Mr.Moseby turned toward Zack and Cody. “You see? These are very special guest. I do not want you to run over them!” “Fine, fine.” Zack turned to Artemis. “Hey, you are kinda cute. What’s your name?” “Zack! Don’t say that to her!” He turned to Artemis. “Hi. I’m Cody. What’s your name?” “My name is Artemis. I would be delighted if you two left me alone.” With that, she walked away. Zack turned to Artemis Fowl. “Did you know that she can’t run well? We nearly ran her over.” Artemis Fowl just turned and left.

“Wait! You forgot your laptop!” I turned around and walked toward him. “Thanks but no thanks. You can keep it. I have about ten more in the suite I am staying in. I have got to go. My brother’s friends are coming over. I have got to make them something to eat or……..” I didn’t finish that sentence. I shuddered as I thought about it. “Bye.” I turned around and started to walk. “Wait!” I turned around and saw Artemis running towards me. It was funny to watch him run. He kept on stumbling. “Are you good at making things to eat?” “No. I am absolutely horrible at it. I still have no idea why he wants me to make him something to eat.” “If you are so bad, I will let Juilet and Butler make it.” “It is okay. I will figure it out somehow.” I turned around and walked up to the suite I was staying with a small smile playing among my lips.

“Arty dear! Where have you been? Did you know that there is a family beside us with a daughter named Artemis? She is also a genius like you. We are going over to them in an hour. I hear that their daughter is an excellent cook.” Artemis stood there dumbstruck. “See you then!”

“Artemis, honey. We are having guest in an hour. They have a son named Artemis too! He is also a genius like you.” “What?!?! I thought that it was Terry’s friends coming over!” “I can’t believe that he kept it a secrett! I will reward him for that.” “Thanks Mom!” That was Terry. He turned to me and said,”I got ya didn’t I squirt?” Then he left. “Darling, could you make some of that delicious food for dinner?” “Yes mother.”

An hour later, Artemis, Butler, Juilet, Beckett, Myles, Artemis’s mother, and Artemis’s father appeared at the door. “Angeline! How nice is it to see you! I hope you don’t mind. A few of Terry’s friends came over. “Artemis! How nice to finally meet you! You and Artemis are so much alike!” “Artemis has a boyfriend? Sweet! I have a plan….” “I do not have a boyfriend! He is just a friend! I thought that you said Terry’s friends were not coming!” “Darling, I told you I was going to reward him! Don’t be so grumpy!” Then she noticed the Fowls standing there along with two people who did not look like Fowls. “Come on in!” “Artemis, stay behind my back.” “Butler, do not be so overprotected. Give Artemis a break, will you?”

“Time to eat! All this food is made by my daughter.It is absolutely delicious! My daughter is very modest. She says that it taste absolutely horrible!” “Child geniuses. They are all the same.” “The plural form of genius is genii! Not geniuses!” “You are so right Mom! They are so much alike! They could be twins!” “Artemis darling, why don’t you go to Artemis’s school. It is a very nice place.” “No. I refuse to go to any other school!” “What kind of food is this Rose? It is absolutely delicious!” “It is Chinese. Our family is Chinese so we decided that you might want to try it!” “May we be excused?” “You and who Artemis?” “Me and her.” “Yes you may.” Oh no! I did not plan on this to happen!

“Why did you not tell me you are Chinese!?!?!?!?” “I thought you knew.” “Do not act sarcastic with me! Why did you not tell me!” “Hey! Are you two arguing! This is the first step! You will be boyfriend and girlfriend in no time!” I threw a pillow at him. “Get out! I do not want to hear, see, or even smell you or your friends! Get out!”

“Angeline, do you think they are all right? I hear a lot of yelling.” “I will go and see.” “No need to trouble yourself Butler. I am sure they are fine.” She spoke to soon. Artemis came out crying. She had her jacket and her card to the suite. “What is wrong Artemis?” She did not answer. She just ran out the door. Artemis came out running and pulling on his jacket. “Wait! Do not go! I am sorry!”

“Hey Zack, what do you think they are doing now?” Just then, Artemis came running into the lobby. Mr.Moseby came towards her and asked her,”What is the matter? Did these hooligans bother you again?” She just ran out the door. Then, Artemis Fowl came running in the lobby. “Wait! I am sorry!” “Wow. Let’s go follow them!” “Wait Zack! I am not so sure we should do that. He is about eighteen with a huge bodyguard. Do you think we should take the chance and be pancakes the next morning?” “I’ll take my chances. Hurry up! You run to slow.”

“Wait! Stop! You are not suppose to run so fast! I am sorry!” “I am only running faster because I want to get away from you!” I just kept on running. I did not want to see or hear him. Was he suppose to have changed after he got back? This was different. You would have never guessed what he did. It was really unlike him. “Wait!” I just kept running. I stopped under a huge, old oak tree with a river near it. Does this seem familiar? Artemis Fowl just kept running straight. Then, a small figure appeared. The figure held out a gun. It looked like the figure was going to shoot me.

“Do not shoot me Holly. Go on and complete the Ritual. I will leave. Just do not tell Artemis.” “Wait! Who are you? How do you know about the Ritual? How do you know my name? How do know Artemis Fowl? Why shouldn’t I tell Artemis about this?” “Please do not tell him Holly. I would tell you why not to, but I do not want to recall the memory. Do not worry. I will not tell anyone about you. Neither will Artemis. If I know what is good for me, I will keep my mouth shut. Goodbye.” “Wait. What is your name?” “It is Artemis.” “WHAT?!?!?! If you two get married, we will have another Artemis Fowl to take care of!” “There is another Artemis Fowl? Where?” “Now is not the time. I will tell you later.” She looked at Artemis. She was blushing. “We will never get married.” Holly grinned evilly. “You don’t know that.” Artemis just shuddered at the thought.



I know it says whatever the girl says will be in bold italic, but it didn't show up so, if you want to see what she said, go here: http://artemisfowl.fangathering.com/fanfiction/crossovers/artemis-meets-the-suite-life

~ Chapter Two ~


“Holly! Have you seen Artemis?” “What did you do to her?” “Have you seen her?” “All right. No need to get a hot head. She went that way. Why do you want to know?” Artemis Fowl looked at her like she was crazy. “I did something I thought I would never do.” He tried to run but fell flat on his face. I got up and walked. “What is with those two? I had better contact Foaly.” “To bad. I already contacted you. Why do you need me? “Foaly! Never do that again! You nearly gave me a heart attack! It looks like we have another Artemis Fowl. If Fowl and the girl get married, the girl will become an Artemis Fowl!”

Meanwhile, back at the hotel

“What do you think happened? She ran out crying.” The door opened and two identical looking boys burst in. “Zack! Where did you get that card?” “Well, I sorta stole from Moseby.” Terry stood up. “What on earth are you doing? You come bursting in without a reason!” Cody said,”Well, we know where that girl is. You know the one wearing a blue dress with a jacket on crying? That was the girl we saw. She was followed by a boy wearing a suit.”

Meanwhile

I stopped and leaned against a tree. My eyes started to water, but I refused to to let them out. Artemis Fowl just had to know I was Asian. I thought about what sort of insults were thrown at me every single time I passed by. “Leave you little freak! You don’t belong with us! Go back to your little freak friends!” or “Go back to where you were from you freak!” I hated it. I heard these every day. I was sick and tired of it. People would insult me by saying negative things about Asians. People thought it was funny to annoy me because I was one. Before I came to Boston, I vowed I would get my revenge one way or another. I had to.

“Hey, Zack, do you think we should tell them that Arwin gave us a tracker and we lost it but it seems that their daughter has it?” Zack Martin looked at his brother. “Naw. Let’s keep them worried. I need to go talk to Maddie. Bye!” Cody shook his head as he watched his brother go flirt with the candy girl.

Artemis found the girl crying by a tree. “Are you okay?”

She looked up. “No. What do you think? My life has been ruined from the start.”

“How?” She didn’t say anything. Artemis sat beside her and tried to comfort her. “Tell me, why are you named Artemis? You also seemed strained by the fact that you have more knowledge than most others.”

“You see, since my mother and your mother are best friends, they decided to name the both of us Artemis. I am strained by the fact that I have more knowledge than others. My mother sent tutor after tutor for me. She expected much from me. After the tutor started drilling question after question at me, I finally snapped. Normally I would be able to stand the strain, but that was it.”

“I’m so sorry.” Artemis Fowl spent the rest of the time trying to comfort the girl.

“Awww. Isn’t that cute?”

“Blechh. It makes me sick.”

“Oh, be quiet Foaly. You’re just jealous because Artemis Fowl has someone and you don’t.”